I mean my toddler was. She was invited to her first Birthday party just before xmas and I think I was more excited than her!
As a child I was never allowed to go to my school friends birthday parties, I remember being invited to one at primary school but mum said no, what r u going to do there? Come home and study…she did agree to get her a gift and equipped me with ‘we have a family function to go to’ excuse. Although my school friend was none the wiser, I however, felt it was unfair and tried to find ways to get her to change her mind all week with no success.
My parents had their reasons and did what they thought was best. It wasn’t right in there belief to interact with school friends outside of school. It was always show your appreciation, say thank you and tell them you can’t come as you have a family function or something along those lines.
My parents generation feared that their children would forget/rebel against their traditional backgrounds. Coming from India, they were brought up with high values, respecting elders and a huge family support system. The west challenged many of these beliefs for our parents as they adjusted to life here and as WE were the first generation to be born and bred in the west they had to figure out how to balance the east and west for their children as well as themselves.
My parents had obviously seen this rebelling happen in the community and admittedly many of my older cousins did rebel; sex, drugs, rock n roll, boy/girl friends, baby out of wed lock, marriage with different ethnic backgrounds, you name it it was all done before I reached secondary school. Maybe they felt they had a duty to ensure I didn’t do the same?
My husband and I however, differ in that not only do we have and understand the values of our elders but also have the ‘western culture’ side kinda’ sorted through experience of living in the west since birth and so have no problem with taking our toddler to the Birthday event.
As I was clearing my toddlers bag at the end of the week, out came an envelope and it was an invite to a birthday party! I was really looking forward to it as I don’t really know many of the mums yet and well I never say no to cake (hehe). The following week I went and purchased a gift for the Birthday boy and wrapped it all up ready to go.
The party itself was in a play barn with a reasonably sized soft play maze and there were about 20 children in the end plus their parents of course. Most of the mums and dads were really pleasant to talk to but I did notice a group of parents comfortably chatting away in their own circle and definitely didn’t want to interact, you know the ‘snobby parents’. This reminded me of all those ‘types of parents you see at parties’ blogs I’ve read and are so true, I can definitely relate!
Snobby parents spotted!
Must have done well though as the following day I received another invite to another birthday party, woohoo!